Due to a series of unavoidable incidents, my anonymity has been violated.
I feel like the naive little kid who was just told that there is no such thing as Santa Claus.
I feel sadness. I feel loss. Things can never be the same.
And my blogging experience has come to mean so much to me in such a short time.
(mostly because of all of you)
Someone too close for comfort discovered my blog. It wasn't Hubs. Foxy's household is not in shambles. As a matter of fact, he's the one helping me keep my shit together. The man is my rock. I've mentioned before that he knows I have a blog and has reaped the many benefits of my blogging adventures. He understands that this is something I do for me. He's happy to leave it at that. His advice is to say "fuck it, who cares?"
Well...........I care. Immensely. I can say without a doubt, that I would be glad to meet any one of my fellow bloggers in person and have no qualms about you knowing what you do about me. We'd be on somewhat even ground. You've shown me yours and I've shown you mine.
However. (big pause followed by a sigh) In real life I am a very private person. I'm open-minded, yes. Honest, yes. But I am not an open book. I stay guarded. I do not tell my secrets. I see too much judgement around me everyday, and the exposure of my blog leaves me wide open to that. That's unacceptable.
I'm weighing my options. I could change my identity and start a new blog. I could start many new blogs and divide my interests among them. (that seems a little "Sybil" to me, but now I know why people do that) It would eat up a lot of free time and I could still be rediscovered.
I could also make my blog private, but I feel like that turns away so many possible followers. I'd be limiting my little blog before it barely got off the ground. Do you know how many great blogs I've found simply by clicking on a link out of curiosity? Of course you do. That's how I found some of you. ;)
I wanna go back and reverse the little things that added up to cause this personal catastrophe of mine. Do they make an app for that? No? Damn.
I'm not going anywhere. What was that favorite quote of mine? Oh, yeah...............I'll put on my big girl panties and deal with it.
Stay tuned. :)
p.s. If by some chance you opened your mouth yesterday to utter the word "fuck" and nothing came out, it's because I used up my daily allowance and stole about 1,000 people's worth. You might've been one of them . I'm sorry.